Offtopic Sofa Time

[Daniela]

I am so sorry to here. My deepest condolences. This is real awful news at the end of the year. I am keeping you in my thoughts and wish your whole family a lot of strength. We just got news yesterday that my uncle is back to hospital. He has an aggressive kind of cancer and things don´t look good for him right now, The ocs say it´s just a matter of time, so I can halfway imagine what you feel like like. Feel free to talk anytime, I am around.

[AnaisSolange]

Hey I know it's been a long time since I came here but life makes I have not had too much time with my mother's health problems and everything. I'm sorry for you Steph, 2018 has not been simple for you I hope that 2019 will be better I wish you all a wonderful year, full of good things especially health.

[ThyneAlone]

Thanks so much to everyone. About to undertake the five-hour drive down to Essex. The funeral's tomorrow. It will be good to see family, but I'll be glad when it's over.

[Daniela]

I hope you managed you get through the day and are okay now.

[stargazer]

Oh no, I’m so sorry Steph! What a horrible thing to go through. My thoughts are with you and your family.

I also had a death in the family although much less traumatic. My 90 year old grandmother passed away on January 8th and I was with her when she passed. She lived on the other side of the country and I was able to visit with her and talk to her before she passed away. I was very close to her and I will never forget my last few days with her.

As hard as that was for me, I can’t imagine what you and your family are going through Steph. My heart goes out to you.

[TJ4ever]

So sorry, Steph! Sending you lots of hugs!

[ThyneAlone]

Hey all
Thank you all for your wonderful support. Those who love TJ are ACE human beings, it must be said!
That's why I'm here to recline on your sofa again and chat about things. Since losing my brother things haven't been ideal either. Within a couple of weeks my son has had a car accident (no people damage but new car needed) and we have lost someone else - a very close friend from university, 59 years old, died on vacation in Madeira because his successful treatment for non-Hodgkins lymphoma had left him vulnerable to severe lung infections including pneumonia.

With everything I have experienced over the last six or seven months, it must look like I am wanting attention or something, but honestly, it's not that, it's just I feel I have friends here I can talk to without causing them pain. Take care of yourselves and thanks. Hopefully positivity will return at some stage!

Love to all.

[TJ4ever]

Sorry I am not here so often anymore. But it's always good to know to have a place to go.

Steph, all the best. Hope that things will get better for you. I know it's a hard time.

[Daniela]

A Fandom should support each other, shouldn´t it? Once again I can only say that I am sorry for your loss, Steph. Believe me, I know how it feels. A few years ago several family members, even close ones and neighbours have died in a row, it was simply awful. I hope that the tight will turn for you soon. Thankfully it was just a material damage for your son. The shock was enough for sure but a car is replacable, that´s the only thing that counts. I hope your husband is doing better in between at least. I keep crossing fingers that you will soon receive some good news!

[Waffle Iron]

It's early morning in France now, 7am, and this sofa is really tempting. So let me have a sit, grab a cup of tea, a piece of chocolate cake and tell you a bit more about the few years I spent.

Coming back here is like being a character in a serie away for some seasons and doing a surprise and unexpected come back

First I want to apologize for not having been able to be here earlier. Life has been hectic, lots of ups and downs.
I don't even know where to start, what to prioritize. Thinking about my hello post, I'll go on with that introduction.

As I've told, some of you used to know me as the waffle lady. And there's been some huge change since then
I've been suffering from gender disphoria since childhood and kept it secret as long as I could, but it turned out to be unbearable. I couldn't take it anymore, so I decided it was enough and accepted who I am. I've started the long transition journey on 29th December 2016 and let me tell you I'm the happiest guy on earth I'm a lucky parent as my 2 sons accepted all this instantly and supported me and still do. It's been harder with the rest of the family, except my sister who supported me warmly and unconditionally.
Unfortunately, breast cancer took her away from us 3 years ago... I've lost my confident and best friend when she left. And I still miss her a lot.
Since then my mother has changed her attitude toward me and we now have a good relationship.

That's for the emotional part, I'm not here to make you cry Professionally, ah... Lot's of issues of course I've been unemployed for years, then a freelance illustrator (I still am) and now a tattoo artist. A friend and I decided to open a tattoo shop in November this year but... Yeah, Covid and new lockdown in France we have to wait for weeks before we can open.

So right now I'm at home, relaxing and drawing, preparing tattoo designs for the opening, drawing for my manga project and painting for commissions.

I hope you are all well and safe.
Oh I'm done with the chocolate cake...

[ThyneAlone]

There's plenty more in the cupboard - biscuits too. Help yourself. Feel the love!

[Daniela]

Hey Waffle Iron,

I think we never wrote before, so firstly: Hi!

Wow, what a journey you have been through in the past two years. Even if I don´t know you, I am totally happy that you found your real you and live your dream. Isn´t it that what it´s all about in life? Good luck for your tattoo studio. Probably it´s not that easy due to the lock down in our countries. Fingers crossed that things will become better according to that as well!

[TJ4ever]

Hi everybody,
Wasn't here for a long time. Just checking in to see how everyone's doing. I'm ok so far. Hope it stays that way for me and my family and friends. My birthday this year was very quiet. Talked a lot and long on the phone with friends and family. Nevertheless it was a nice day. But hopefully I can spend my birthday next year with all my friends and family in person again.
Hope you all are ok.
Stay healthy, stay safe, take care!

[Daniela]

A very happy belated Birthday to you! It´s good to hear that you still had a nice day. I am sure that you will be able to have a party again next year. Stay healthy and happy too.

[TJ4ever]

Thank you very much, Daniela. I really hope that I can spend my birthday next year with family and friends again. Hoping to get the vaccination, soon. But I guess it won't be until the end of summer. Take care!

[hanneDK]

Hi all,

I know I haven't been in a while - heck I cannot remember when I last posted anything!
First of all, let me give my deepest condolences to Steph, and to all who have lost a dear family menber, since my last posting/visit. I have not gone through all 168 pages.

Not sure where to start, so sorry if I repeat myself.:
Since summer of 2013 I have been employed and unemployed on/off - my longest employment was 1½ yrs, almost 2.
Also in 2013, just before we said hello to 2014, I suffered an injury in my lower part of my back/hips, this is still bugging me. 2 doctors gave me different explanations and my physio did too.
In December 2014 I lost my mom due to complications - kidney failiure, cancer, bowl obstructions - it hurt a lot and I am still not completely over it.

From 2020 my weight went up, due to bad eating and a lot of other things - I suspect a depression, which I have not gotten confirmed. HOwever in 2020 I confronted my family with my thoughts and feelings, which also held suicide throughts (however since I am writing this post) I never followed through, thanks to my doctor and long talks with my family. In January 2021 my doctor applied on my behalft, after several consultations, for a gastrict bypass - my first meeting was held late November 2021. So now I am attending regular meetings, both by myself or in a group. Hopefully my last meeting will be where the doctors gives me a date for the procedure.

2021 was a turbulent year. My dad became ill late May and sadly passed away early August. It was a mix of a lot of things - diabetes, issues with his legs - to make it short: we never got a complete diagnosis - which we have accepted, but it was very hard to loose him.
During the month he was hospitalized, he was tossed between emergency, cardio and rehab, by the last few weeks of his life, he was admitted to the kidney ward (I do not remember the correct termology). When we visited him for the first time in this ward, he was, to our shock, given the same room our mother was in during her stay and subsequently death in 2014. I had to leave his room, seconds after seeing him, because of the shock. I cried.
We talked to the nurses and explained everything - and luckily he was given a new room.
The last time I saw him alive, was the day before he passed away. His girlfriend of 3 years, had stayed by his side during all of this and was the one who saw him pass away - we are still in touch with her, as we (my brother and I) still consider her as part of the family.
The day he passed away I was at work (was on a short term employment and had explained everything to my employer, so I was given the okay to work from home) - his GF called my shortly after 9.30 but I was in a meeting so I called her back afterwards - and the only thing she said to me: call your brother, which I did and that's where I received the sad news. Immediately called my boss and told him what had happend. I have never gotten ready to leave that quickly.
A week later we held his funeral and it was beautiful - a number was played by Pearl Jam "Just breathe" - I cannot listen to it without breaking apart, family and close friends came. The undertaker was luckily our cousin, so we were in great hands. The reception was held at our aunt and uncle's house, they offered their home to us, which we were gratefull for.

After my dad's passing and during his hospitalizion I couldn't function - I was a mess. So I went of sick leave after af few month, which were suggested by my union and consultant at the local unemployment center. I am starting to see a shrink in a few weeks, and shortly thereafter I expect to return to normal. I am in a better state than I was shortly after my dad.

Think I have remebered everything. It's been a loong post.. Hope to become a regular again

hugs and kisses, Hanne

[Daniela]

Hey Hanne,

I guess we haven´t written yet, at least I can´t remember actively. It seems a whole log you´ve been through and I hope things will become better for you step by step. My fingers are crossed for a brighter 2022! All the best!